The end of the year is fast approaching, and it has been quite the year.  2020 has been a year that many people thought would never end—with each month introducing a new catastrophe and the insanity of quarantine driving people so absolutely bonkers that for some reason mullets are making a comeback—but that’s for a different blog.

As we draw towards the end of the year it is a perfect opportunity to allow for contemplation and self-reflection.  It is a time for us to consider what we have done this year—our failings and faults, our joys, our strengths, our blessings and struggles.  It is a time to consider what we want the next year to look like—where can we improve? How can we make the world a better place?—but most importantly: What Shoes Should be made Illegal in 2021?

“We know what you’re thinking: “are they finally going to do it? Are they going to FINALLY publicly condemn Crocs?!??”. Well, we are here to tell you, that you would be completely and totally….. wrong. We are in fact NOT going to condemn crocs, but instead commend the use of crocs when utilized for its correct purpose. It is easily conceded that crocs, although decidedly not attractive shoes, do serve a functionality which far exceeds any shoe that we have covered in this blog so far. When walking around the house, or on one of those days running errands when you don’t particularly mind being mistaken for a homeless man, they are perfectly acceptable foot wear. In this case, crocs functionality outweigh their ugliness.

However, this does not concede that every croc that exists on this planet now has a free pass to just be just as ugly as it wants to be and get away with it. There are some crocs that are emphatically some of the ugliest shoes to exist on this planet and I believe that you would readily agree with me that they should be made illegal going in to 2021. I present to you Example One: The Platform Croc. Now, first and foremost, the croc loses all of its functionality in this form, because strapping a rubber block onto your foot is never a functional option in your day to day life. Who decided that adding five pound weights to each shoe would somehow improve the design of the croc? This shoe vaguely reminds me of a brief period in my life when I would stuff alphabet blocks into my socks and walk around the house so that I could look cool wearing heels–painful? Yes. Worth it? Absolutely not.

Example Two would quite obviously be this hideous creation. This shoe’s official name is: “Help! I’m having a mental breakdown.” I always wonder what the creators of these shoes were thinking while they made them, and I can only assume that the thought process probably went something like: “Mmh, let’s put some middle school Starbuck’s white girl and a little bit of desperate mother of eight carrying in the groceries after the kids raided the candy box. Great, perfect. We did it.” And on that day the world became a little darker. The creation of this sickening shoe was not the intended purpose of mankind and the creation of it clearly point to an abuse of our own God-given gifts.

God, in His infinite wisdom, created all things to be good, true and beautiful. All of creation was intentional and planned–all things were created good–all gifts bestowed upon us served a purpose in His salvific plan to draw us ever closer to Him, each a reflection of Himself and His eternal love for us. When we sin, this order is disrupted because sin is a distortion of the good, a wrongful abuse of the gifts God has given us and the purpose for which they have been ordained. We see this very clearly present in our world today: Power, which should be used as an opportunity to serve others, is instead turned into corruption and bribery. Strength, which should be utilized for the protection of the most vulnerable, is instead used to take advantage of them. Wealth, which allows the opportunity for generosity, instead fosters greed. And crocs, which serve a functional purpose of comfort and support, are desecrated by the creation of the aforementioned atrocities. These things often seem unthinkably horrendous and yet they are common occurrences that we encounter in our daily lives, either through our own actions or through others.

Lucky for us, we have a God who is a lot smarter than us–and a lot more merciful. Through His Grace and Mercy, He has granted us the Sacrament of Confession as a means by which He restores us and leads us back to Himself. Canon 987 states that(pg 694): “In order to receive the salvific remedy of the sacrament of penance, the Christian faithful ought to be so disposed that, having repudiated the sins committed and having a purpose of amendment, they are converted to God.” We must come to the altar of God with a sincere repentance and resolve to never commit these offenses again and forgiveness will be obtained.

Knowing this, think back on the year of 2020 and ruminate on all that you have done. In what areas of your life can you cultivate the gifts that God has given you? Where are the distortions of the good in your life, where has sin infiltrated? How can you correct that?

Start your 2021 the right way: go to confession and cleanse your soul then go home and purge your closet of all its ugly shoes.

Peace Homeboys. Spuds out.